Open Letter to the Couple in the Back

Dear You Two Over There,

You went through all the trouble of waking up this morning and dragging yourself to class. And its a morning class, no less, meaning that you have to make a serious effort to get here. Its not easy to make a 9:30am class. Believe me, I know.
But if you are going to go through all that effort, what is the point of sitting in the back and talking the entire time? You definitely aren’t here to learn anything. Stay at home, get some more sleep, and meet up for coffee later. Better yet, take that girl on a date, kid. You both are obviously into each other.
We aren’t in high school anymore. Attendance in our ginormous Microeconomics class is hardly mandatory. I mean, a girl I know still has yet to attend a single class (and had to ask where our classroom was located when test time came). If she can do it, then you can definitely miss at least one Wednesday morning, no sweat.
And even on the off chance that you don’t value sleep and don’t wish to meet up later to discuss your extremely important issues, please be courteous to others. You may not realize this, but when you chat in class, your voices carry. They carry really far. Think about it scientifically. When there are only two voices in the room at a time (the teachers and yours), they both are pretty easy to hear. Fact.
So while I commend you for talking indistinctly enough for me to not get the gist of your conversation, I still wish you would have put a lid on it (or at least have talked loud enough to let me in on the gossip). Really. Its distracting and annoying. And unfair. I’m paying for this class and want to understand what’s going on. But that droning coming from you two is frustrating me to the max. Next time, please stay home.
But hey, it’s my birthday! So I’ll forgive you today, because I’m in a great mood.
Your Fellow Classmate,
Virginia
P.S. I was serious about taking that girl out on a date, dude. She really likes you.
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